Jun 17, 2010

Monkeys Go Bye

An Excerpt from a Double-Secret Letter to Hekellu-bound White Stone Monkeys (Plus Team Vriddi) from Noble Shen they leave hanging in Butrus

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(Typical platitudes deleted for brevity's sake.  Also shen no pay for extra words.  Punch scribe not write what shen tell them.  You can no add that.)

Dear Monkeys,

Sorry you leave good-place Butrus. Not know much about Hekellu. No shen there, or so say the Major Domo. Maybe it too cold. Much-many Ssu though, so you get lots practice smacking them with sharp objects and boom-thingys. That always good fun.

Shen staying in Butrus, for now. Many new monkey-friends here. Shenyu sending more helper-shen soon. Need to have new villa up and running for them when they get here. Red Hats not so bad. Everyone handing shen monies. Much profit make for happy shen.

War coming. Big war. Pe Choi unhappy. Livyani unhappy. Tsolyani always nervous. Red Hats killing Pachi Lei treehuggers. Yan Koryani tourists out in the woods. Shen coming to town. Maybe we have big party? Shen like that.

Shen want permission to use Vriddi Hunting Lodge for discrete business-like dealings and some errends. No make mess. Clean-up afterwards. Shen promise.

If you meet any Hlaka on road, send some to Shen. That be muchly appreciated. Could use some Hlaka couriers for the next few months. Many-much things to get said to peoples all over. Much talkings. Many businesses. Also, kick any ahoggya you meet for me. Stinky things. Pfah!

Let Shen know if you require a shen or two to help you break down doors or go exploring cellars and tubeway cars in Hekellu. More shen coming soon. Me share some with you, if you like-want. Shen good at breaking things. Good fighters. Good in middle of war like we having soon.

Vriddi pay very good, White Stone monkeys very nice to shen--you all have place to stay after clanhouse destroyed and Butrus put to sword and torches. Shen help you people rebuild after big to-do. Yes. Shen very good friend to monkeys. Put in good word for you clan with new monkey-rulers. You see.

Ask one last question --very busies right now -- Tubeway Car go to Hekellu?

Good travel and much lootings!

The Shen

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